Monday, June 04, 2007

Swade disses Saab, Warms up to Hummer!


Trollhattan, Sweden - In an incredible reversal of thought, Steven Wade (aka Swade), author and avid Saab supporter, has made the move that nobody expected -- he's decided to support GM's newest division, Hummer, in their quest to become the world's most hated automotive brand.

"Once I saw how at home the H3 looked in Stockholm, I simply couldn't deny it any longer," Swade proclaimed on his first trip to Saab's mother country. "It's a bit on the large side, but if it works in an old European city like Stockholm, just imagine how one will look in my driveway in Hobart!"

Swade went on to gesture emphatically towards his new-found passion. "You've got to love the bling!", he said, adding, "And the crash test ratings are phenominal! The Hummer H2 and H3 simply crush other vehicles on contact. Who needs air bags when you've got Newtonian physics on your side?"

Of course, this leaves thousands of Trollhattan Saab readers in a bit of a quandry. "I simply can't believe it," said Steve Shannon, the newly appointed President of Saab USA. "I was counting on the buzz from TrollhattanSaab.net to introduce the all-new 2008 Saab 9-3 here in the US. You can't replace word-of-mouth advertising like that. I'm on the phone now with Jan-Ake to discuss how we'll handle a crisis of this magnitude. It's a huge loss."


It is rumored that Swade has also secretly been courting the Alfa Romeo community, but that Hummer eventually won him over with it's overall style and sensibilities.


In a parting shot, Mr. Wade says this to his former readers: "You dorks and your ignition switches between your seats. Grow up. Get a REAL ride like the H3."


----AP-----(not)

8 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Brilliant!! You've found me out.

9:38 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hilarious, brilliant and absolutely funny ! / Mats

10:32 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yeah, and I hear he's secretly negotiating with the owner of the green and yellow Caddy for use as a daily driver until he can afford the H3!

10:37 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Nice.

Now we have to think one up about you!

10:45 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Look how he's giving the thumbs-up! It's true! ;-)

12:58 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

eggsngrits, you are too much! LOL

zippy from t'saab.net :-)

3:51 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That's gold eggs, not only have you hijacked TS but you're also pirating traffic from it. Anyway gotta go see what trade I'll get for 2 Saabs on a new Hummer H3 at my local Saab dealer. 2/5s of f-all I bet.

Mmmmmm, breakfast.

turbin

8:15 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Damn funny thou

9:16 AM  

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